The Power Of Self-Talk

I recently posted a very powerful post on my Facebook and Instagram pages, and I wanted to delve deeper into it. “Why do you stay in prison when the door is wide open?” ~ Rumi You see, the first place that we are imprisoned in is in our own mind. Yes, things happen in life that can drastically alter the course of life, but even in these instances, we still have a choice to remain a victim of our circumstances, or whether we rise regardless of our challenges and rebuild our lives powerfully. That choice is, and always will be yours, and no situation or circumstance will be able to take that away from you. I hear many stories of people who live their lives feeling a victim of what has happened too them, without fully realising that it is a choice that they (subconsciously) make to stay there. I know this, because I was very much there at one stage of my life, and I fiercely believed that it I couldn’t do anything to change my situation. Why? Because that belief was a story that I told myself over and over again, until I believed it with absolute faith. Now, for me, it wasn’t until I started my self-development journey many years ago, did I start to question this belief that I had been carrying around and acting out of for some time. I discovered that my identity was based on a young girl who suffered two major brain injuries, that left me with a multitude of issues and had a devastating effect on my childhood.  I had told myself that my life was always going to be in a state of suffering. And guess what? It was. It would stay that way, until I consciously chose something different. But choosing something … More

Dealing with plateau’s

Recovery can be a hard slog. It can have many twists and turns, ebbs and flows, highs and lows. There will be times when it feels like the improvements are really noticeable and consistent, and then there will be periods where it feels like nothing is improving or perhaps you feel like you have gone backwards. These times, for many (myself included), are the most frustrating! Well, I’m right here now, so I thought I would share with you my tips for getting through the ‘plateau’ stage. Firstly, experiencing a plateau is completely normal and expected. Here’s why. Immediately after injury, the brain goes into a “heightened state of plasticity”. What this means is that when the damage first occurs, the brain reacts by temporarily making it easier for itself to reorganise (called spontaneous recovery). It just happens. So, you may have or are, experiencing rapid improvement and then after a time (generally after 3 months), the brain reverts back to a less pliable, but still plastic state (see neuroplasticity or brain plasticity). This can be frustrating to say the least, but it doesn’t mean that further improvement is not possible. There is also something that is called “diminishing returns”, which all of us experience in life, and brain injury recovery is no different. Take for example, learning to paint – you go to your first class and you will leave knowing 10 times more things about painting than when you first arrived. Now, fast forward to a year of painting classes – the difference in ability between your 90th and 95th painting is going to be much smaller than the first 5 painting you did. This is because when we first learn something, there will be a stage of rapid improvement (called rapid spontaneous progress) as we learn new skills and … More

It is possible to rewire your brain to think positively!

There was a period of time after my first 2 brain haemorrhages where I lost hope. I felt trapped in a body that didn’t function. I felt beyond broken, and I couldn’t see how my life could possibly be worth living. I was very much a victim of my circumstances, and I couldn’t see a way out. I didn’t believe that my life would get better, let alone be extraordinary! I certainly didn’t realise it at the time, that was the key that triggered change – How I believed things to be. When you convince yourself of life being one way, that’s exactly how it is. Why? Because you direct your thoughts to match your beliefs. A pivotal point in my recoveries came when I witnessed people who were much worse off than me, still smiling and remaining positive no matter what life served them, including death. If they could, there was NO reason why I couldn’t. It wasn’t something that happened overnight. It wasn’t a quick fix, it took a conscious effort. The more conscious I became, the more I challenged my thoughts about my current reality. I discovered that our thoughts shape our reality. By changing our thoughts, we can change our reality. Now, that’s not to say that it changed my reality of being paralysed overnight, it did not. Nor did it change the difficulties that I had with my speech, the pretty much non – existent memory, the emotional lability, the intense and very frequent headaches or the learning difficulties. It is easy to get caught up on the actually physicality of the issues that you have, without much though beyond that. What has happened is only one part of the equation. How you choose to respond to what has happened is where you will find either your reasons … More

Dealing with disappointment.

Disappointment is just the action of your brain re-adjusting itself to reality after discovering things are not the way you thought they were. ~ Brad Warner Everything can change in a split second, changing the course of life as you once knew it. I get it. It can be shattering and incredibly disappointing!The reality is – You are here and nothing is going to change what has happened. It is done, and it cannot be undone. While this might be very hard to swallow and accept, it is your reality. So why not deal with things as they are right here, right now? Dealing with disappointment is often complex, as it comes with a mirage of emotions such as anger, sadness, frustration and impatience just to name a few. Learning to deal with disappointment has been a pivotal turning point in my recoveries, and I want to share with the key things that have been fundamental in healing from my three major brain injuries, as well as other life trauma’s. Let it all out. What you have been through is HUGE! It is natural to grieve after experiencing any form of trauma that alters the course of your life. We often spend so much time trying to run from anything that causes us pain or upset, and in doing so, we deny ourselves the first stage of our healing process. Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling without any agenda or attempt to speeding up the process. Whatever you are feeling is okay. Take some time to just sit with your emotions and experience it without moving to fix or change it. If you need to have a good cry, or express the rawness of how you are feeling (as long as you don’t lash out at others or cause harm to yourself). Do it! … More